The unfolding of your words gives light.
— Psalm 119:1
"So, how do you know it was the Holy Spirit?"
Certainly not by being told by anyone. It's obvious by the conversation, and even more so as time goes on (see the above verse). Even if it weren't, it doesn't matter. The words spoken were truth; and, truth can be spoken by anyone—even the Devil—and never be any less truth. All I need to know about someone can be determined by their conversation with you. If you know what is good, holy, righteous, prudent, wise, you will know value when you see it.
What's included...
This post lists three vital facts about your salvation as imparted by my direct encounter with the Holy Spirit in April 2014. They all have a basis in Scripture; so, don't think I am trying to change or add to what you should already know. By informing you of these, I am merely supporting with experience and not just biblical knowledge the same assertions heard in many a sermon.
What's not included...
There is one thing that most might expect to find in this post, but which is absent—that, of course, an accounting of events and circumstances that precipitated the encounter. That's a real barn-burner of a tale (to use the
demonic idiom), believe it. Maybe I'll tell it someday; but, it would be an affront to the Spirit to do anything at this point but to pass on what I learned. An encounter with any member of the Trinity has something to offer everyone. The experience is
never for just those so encountered. That means I am obligated to pass on only what I learned to others unless the circumstances of the experience relate to what I learned. They do to an extent; but, they can be omitted without detracting from the knowledge born of them.
Even still, I would not be inclined to do it without the 20 or so people who can witness to it. I absolutely do not mind sharing the details of my encounter; but, there are witnesses to it that do not like to speak on it (namely, the Voices Demons and various medical personnel employed by Santa Clara County Health and Hospital Systems). To this day, they find the event unnerving and counterproductive to their agenda. Unless and until they are ready and willing to disclose their recollection as well, I would say that a single man's voice does a great injustice to all concerned.
Besides, without corroborating testimony, what merit would my story have? If my audience does not have any stories of their own, how could they rightly evaluate the merit of mine? My story does not entail any facts that could not be corroborated by the Scripture; but, how does that tell anyone anything they should not already know? That I had an encounter should be sufficient to advise anyone who could be made to believe that such a thing happens can readily believe my story based on my key takeaways from it.
NOTE | It also violates the long-standing policy of this blog to publish any information that cannot be substantiated by reproducibility, published testimony from a trusted source, or by evidence in the form of digital media.
There has to be a highly credible body of testimony—many people from all walks of life, some with things in common, some with nothing in common, and all with the same story to credibly tell it to those who have had no such experience. There is not a man alive who would believe it otherwise. I have such a body of witnesses, as I said; but, the only thing I am missing is willingness (the event worked out for nobody present but me, if you're wondering about the source of their unwillingness).
What I learned
Even still, I'll offer some of the key facts about sin that I learned from my encounter with the Holy Spirit; if you choose to believe them, you will do exceedingly well in the Judgment:
- The Holy Spirit—not God, not Jesus—is the only member of the Trinity that you are likely to have a direct encounter with—and, that only by calling out to Jesus, and by having a true, dire need for intervention. To be answered in the affirmative, it has been made abundantly clear that you have to have profit-sharing status with Heaven (the Scripture teaches that, of course, but in different words—mine are better). Not only does your past faith have to be evidenced by at least some of the fruits of the Holy Spirit, but your future faith has to evidence a clear understanding of why these are vital in the form of a plan for building on them. You'll note from Revelation 2-3 that past good works cannot be repeated in the future and still be called good works. They are stepping stones to greater works. Without a clear plan of increase and a foundation on which to increase, you have no pull with Jesus. Believe it. Regardless of the nature of your call, there will be a discussion about your sin. You will be given the soundest of minds and all the incentive that can be given for engaging a truthful question-and-answer argument to defend (or deride) your wrongful actions. The point is to ascertain your recollection of the wrong, exhaust your excuses, and then determine your attitude afterwards. At the end of up, if you can say, "I guess I was wrong; I'm sorry," because that's honestly how you feel, you're good; otherwise, I shudder to think. This conversation happens while literally dangling over the pit of destruction—and, you know it the whole time. It's how such encounters begin.
- There is no big sin or small sin that is determined by the particulars of the sin. Guilty of one, guilty of all holds true in that vein. There is a difference, however, in the magnamity of sin. The small ones are any you acknowledge, contemplate and regret; the big ones are the ones you overlook and later forget. Were you rude back to someone who was rude to you first? If you fail to recognize the error or fail to apologize are not as bad as failing to remember even doing it until you were reminded. That kind of error—not the size of the sin or the justification you had for it—is damnable in the literal sense. It is hard for people to see how small stuff like that can be worthy of Hell; but, it is every bit the error that any other sin is when you judge a wrong as right and then dismiss it from your mind altogether.
- Judgment by the Holy Spirit never addresses the sin you commit that you acknowledge and grieve, but only the sin you don't. Let's say you're a raging homosexual that you didn't mean to be; if you're sincere in your lament of your condition, the Holy Spirit will find no occasion to berate you for it. It's not whether you sinned (that's a given for everyone), it's your attitude towards it. You will never stop being tempted until the day of salvation anyway; you will not be fixed of your propensity for sin anytime prior to then. But, God is not expecting you to be fixed; but, rather, to desire a respite and to add something better than sin into your roll. You can take comfort in the fact that, while you still may be tempted to sin or are still be burdened by a history of same, a policy of never encouraging that same sin in anyone else is an act sufficient to achieve and maintain a firm confidence that you can be saved—even when others are adamant that you cannot. In the six years since, I have tested beyond testing that a Spirit-reinforced confidence is as unshakable and unmovable as any of its gifts or fruits. Call it like you see it, if you must; see how that avails you in the end or in the present. The opposite of a refusal to promote sin is to demote because of it. Bring no one down because of their sin; simply keep your own in check.
The true gift imparted by an encounter with the Holy Spirit is the repurposing of your God-given knowledge accumulated by a life of true faith. It all makes sense, is what you'll say by the end; and, you won't stop saying it anytime soon afterwards. From this, those who are serious about life and what they read in the Scripture can take heart that all the intellectualizing and emotion poured into the Word holds value for a later time. You may find knowledge rewarding at anytime; but, nothing compares to the fire lit inside you by the Holy Spirit using that knowledge. A lifetime of soul-searching combined with a single encounter with the Holy Spirit, and you will never be moved, and no weapon formed against you will prosper.
Amen. This fact should bring a lot of comfort and confidence to those who struggle with sin. Conversion from sinner to saint has a negative and positive element: repentance (taking away of sin) and faith (adding knowledge and practice). You can struggle to take away the sin while adding to your knowledge and good works. One does not supplant the other; but, one is not dependent on the other for the same benefit. My strategy prior to my encounter and my strategy ever since for justifying myself before God has been to do all the good I can while chipping away at my sinful nature. It is indeed hard to be tempted and to succumb to it after having gone a long time without and on top of a monumental effort to increase your faith by knowledge and works; however, what will lift your spirits every time is a comprehensive course of study and an ever-increasing involvement in the charity of Christ. God still wants you as long as there is something about you to want. Appealing to the pragmatic needs of the earth, which remain regardless of your righteousness, will get you through a rough patch every time.
By the end of it, I had a balanced and accurate perspective on the gravity of sin. I was not led to believe that sin was less serious than I thought; rather, I was informed as to how to productively and resolutely handle it. Ignorance and lack of outside perspective are the only strengths sin has to work with; remove these obstacles, and then you can move ahead.
Moreoever, I came out of this knowing that, regardless of whether I use that knowledge, the fact that the Holy Spirit imparted it to begin with meant that, at least at that time, I was capable of achieving salvation, and that salvation was still being offered to me. As rare as these things seem to be, and as precious as God's time likely is, that statement cannot be overvalued. The life of a demoniac can always use that kind of affirmation. It didn't hurt that my opposition witnessed it, either. It nailed to the Cross shame and guilt as a tool for dissuading a sound mind from reasoning correctly, and from being brave enough to appropriate the free gift of salvation being offered to him.
I could say more; but, suffice it to say, anyone who would not have already expected this as an outcome, and, I'd say anyone who could not add a couple of things to it on their own, would not find my story anything but one of magical fantasy, and that would make the Spirit mad. Believe that.
And, now, for the half a thing...
I call this next thing I learned only half a thing because although I wouldn't have known it absent the encounter, I am sure it wasn't meant to be conveyed as a point to ponder like the other three things. It's more of a deduction on my part that I am quite sure is solid.
It shouldn't be a shock that this comes almost seven years after the encounter. After all, the ongoing revelation that is part-and-parcel to God's Word is long-established, Psalms 119:130 being the most notable reference to it in recorded history:
The unfolding of your words gives light...
A lot of what God says to someone (or what is read as said by God) hits them only when they are ready. That always seems to happen with things He said without saying, if that makes sense to you. That's what this post is about. The encounter was a trial-style affair; He asked questions, I answered them. That is all there was to it from beginning to end. After that, He's gone; and, you're left at first with the obvious takeaways, such as your gratitude for surviving it, as I did in my case. It's later on when something comes up that you say, Oh! That was the point... It doesn't happen often, thankfully, because they are hard points under hard circumstances; and, they demand changes that you can't avoid making and they reveal things you can't ignore. They also make you face certain facts that may or may not be pleasant. That happened to me today.
I hadn't planned on visualizing someone's eternal demise today as intensely as I did; but, I saw it clearly, and it invoked a bit of horror and sympathy I just as much hadn't planned on having invoked. To explain:
As I may or may not have mentioned, the exchange was terse. You might think that would be a given, but if you saw the list of things discussed, you'd think there was a mismatch between the manner and the offense. Apparently, God doesn't go over the things you do wrong that you already know are wrong—why labor the point? He didn't make Creation to be unnecessarily burdened by the task of repeating Himself, I am assuming. It's the stuff you didn't know was wrong, or should have known was wrong, or thought was right under the circumstances but would be wrong otherwise.
It was stuff that anyone would justify like this: Hey, everyone agrees with me, so I'm right—I can't be blamed—and, it was just a retort to a retort! Who wouldn't do it? Who wouldn't expect it? But, the thing was, He was angry—very much so.
NOTE
I already used the tenor of the conversation as a personal testimony to God's well-documented anger over all sin great and small.
Many years later, after watching and suffering from the unfettered evil that is the subject of this blog, I thought to myself, If that's how God acts over "small" things with someone who is more than willing and able to correct them, then it's going to be a "sad day coming" for those evil. For a long time, that aspect of the encounter made it hard to be happy about. Because of it, I continually had to remind myself that, overall, it was a good thing—that's how hard it was.
I am not sure this helps that, but I surmise that the Day of Judgment is going to be harsh, even if you're in the clear. You're going to see some anger, to be sure; and, it's going to mitigate the joy of the Day (unless you're just a sicko like the freaks that are the subject of this blog). I see now that His anger wasn't personal, per se (although it should be applied to the personal, of course); it's the mood in Heaven, and everybody's going to get a measure of it, if needs be.
So, that's something to think about, even with all the confidence in the world in your salvation. Be ready for a somber affair. You'll see some things that'll stick with you forever, starting now if you really believe.
A related Psalm...
It's not uncommon for those who seek God to have thoughts in common with others who seek same. That's why the Book of Psalms resonate with so many people, of course. Like just about everyone else, I can relate to a lot of what he wrote; but, like everyone else, some of it seems to gush about things I just can't see myself gushing about.
Okay, I'll just say it: some Psalms of praise read like a drunk's love letter; and, the Psalms that venerate God's (eventual) vengeance on the proud wrong sound like a rant, like that person's way of dealing with their anger over a slight, but only their way and not necessarily yours. Psalm 73 is an example of the latter:
1 {A Psalm of Asaph.} Truly God is good to Israel, even to such as are of a clean heart.
2 But as for me, my feet were almost gone; my steps had well nigh slipped.
3 For I was envious at the foolish, when I saw the prosperity of the wicked.
4 For there are no bands in their death: but their strength is firm.
5 They are not in trouble as other men; neither are they plagued like other men.
6 Therefore pride compasseth them about as a chain; violence covereth them as a garment.
7 Their eyes stand out with fatness: they have more than heart could wish.
8 They are corrupt, and speak wickedly concerning oppression: they speak loftily.
9 They set their mouth against the heavens, and their tongue walketh through the earth.
10 Therefore his people return hither: and waters of a full cup are wrung out to them.
11 And they say, How doth God know? and is there knowledge in the most High?
12 Behold, these are the ungodly, who prosper in the world; they increase in riches.
I encounter such persons on occasion, and when I do, I am often reminded (by them, believe it or not) about my encounter with the Holy Spirit, to which many of them are a witness and party to. It came up recently that some of them, believe it or not, actually think they are saved—that God likes who they are or what they do. Very, very few actually have an opinion either way; but, there are some who are firm in their conviction that they are justified in the Law.
NOTE
I am not challenged by this in any way, mind you. It is a complete failure of basic logic and comprehension to think in this way.
A most recent encounter with someone who thinks this way made me think of what their true end will be a little more deeply than I have in similar situations in times past. This time, I also felt what their true end will be, in a way. It was like:
17 Until I went into the sanctuary of God; then understood I their end.
God is ever-so pissed [Romans 1:18], and it's going to be bad for them. Real bad:
18 Surely thou didst set them in slippery places: thou castedst them down into destruction.
19 How are they brought into desolation, as in a moment! they are utterly consumed with terrors.
20 As a dream when one awaketh; so, O Lord, when thou awakest, thou shalt despise their image.
Because of my experience, I know enough of how bad it is going to be to actually feel sorry for what are literally the most despicable beings who have ever existed. I'm telling you: only God could do that, and only if you experienced it for yourself. That's why I never could get into this Psalm before.
